A WINNING PATH TO COLLEGE ADMISSION

Is there more competition now? Are some colleges harder to get into? Do more and more kids want to go to college? Does the college process have to be a frantic, stressful mess? Yes, yes, yes, and NO!

Played well, the college search is fun and exciting; and played poorly? Yes, a frantic frenzy is out there for you to experience.

OUR BIG FOUR pieces of advice:

• Make Sanity a goal
• Start early and give yourself plenty of Time
• Understand the Game
• Plan and Control what you can

  SANITY

You can start early, plan, and do all the right things, but if you have the wrong attitude, it won't matter. You'll drive yourself nuts anyway.

Will you feel slightly sick when you drop your application in the mail or hit the Send button. Probably! After all, who wants to be judged by people who only know you on paper? But there is no reason you have to be a nervous mess for months.

There are plenty of colleges where you can be happy.

Here is the truth: if you want to go to college, you can go! Experiencing scarcity in the face of abundance is foolish. We live in amazing abundance in this country in terms of college availability. Want to go to college? Okay, you can go! This doesn't mean life or college admission is fair. Some parents have given a library to their college, some kids run fast, and we all know THAT kid who goofs around with his or her calculator in class, rarely studies, and gets an A in Calculus. So what? If YOU want to go to college, YOU can go. Even very real difficulties like financial situations or learning disabilities do not have to stop you from being educated - they just make the process more complicated.

Be reality based. If you tell yourself you will only be happy at one school which happens to accept only 11% of their applicants, I hope the library is named after your mother. Otherwise, you have made a mistake; not in applying to that school, but in your attitude. Last year, UC Berkeley turned down 8,802 students and UCLA turned down 9,339 students with a 4.0 or higher GPA! These thousands of students were probably disappointed, but if they did a good job in the process, they are now in wonderful schools, developing and learning. The reality is that there are many great students who are applying to college! But there are also many great schools! Your job is NOT to find the one right school for you; your job is to find a bunch of schools for you.

Admission is a match to be made, NOT a prize to be won.

There are many colleges where you can be happy, flourish, be educated, and make life-long friends. Make this your goal: to find several schools that match what YOU want in a college. Pick some schools that might be hard for you to get into, pick some schools where your chances are good, and make sure to apply to two schools where you WILL get in. If you have done a good job in thinking about what you want (crucial!), you will likely be happy with the college you attend.

  START early and give yourself plenty of TIME

The first practical step to sanity is to take plenty of time; the most frantic kids and families usually start late.

• See: Traps to Avoid: Two kids (and their families) who messed up the process …

It is especially important to take plenty of time if you are looking at unusual situations, for example California kids looking at small colleges in the east, suburban kids with little urban experience thinking they are city folk, urban kids thinking a small town in Maine is IT, etc.

Taking your time allows the important interplay between discovering who you are and finding the colleges that are a match. Time lets you change your mind and have new college ideas arrive without the pressure of having to decide.

If you give yourself plenty of time, you can adapt as you go. If you don't, you may find yourself taking the December SAT suffering from the flu, fever and shakes after staying up all night getting an application done.

  UNDERSTAND the GAME

Due to a lack of experience, people often start by looking up famous colleges and quickly becoming frustrated or discouraged.

If this college thing is new to you, do these things first — you will be glad you did:

• If you live close to the East Bay, try to attend one of our free College Information Evenings. Many parents have attended several times bringing friends and family!
• Read our GETTING STARTED items first … maybe even several times:
  1. Tips for Parents:  Dos and Don'ts for Helping Your Child Through College Admission
  2. Best and simplest planner we've seen:  The Pre-College Planner
  3. Five Most Important Factors in Admission
  4. Traps to Avoid - Two kids and their families who messed up the process…

  PLAN and CONTROL what you can

There are many things out of your control:

• Who from your school will apply to your first choice college?
• Will some idiot break up with you on Friday night before your SAT.
• Your first choice college somehow becomes the hot school this year (this happens often).
• The reader at the school you REALLY want to go to picks up your application while suffering from a headache and distracted by the crisis call she got from a vice-principal about her own child's behavior and suspension.

Things you can control and do:

• Read and use the to do list for each grade.
• Learn what tests are needed for different colleges.
• Make a calendar and register for the tests.
• Make a calendar for the college research and financial aid search.
• Visit nearby colleges to learn about types of schools you like and don't like.
• Develop college lists: read books, look on the web.
• If you are applying to selective private or public schools (UC in California), understand how their admissions are different.
• Research your chances (see our freshman profile section).
• Be sure that at least two schools you WILL definitely get into are schools you WANT to attend.
• Remember that there are MANY schools where you can be happy!

Lastly, try to have FUN! This process is about your future and how exciting and amazing is that?! Remember, there are many colleges where you can flourish.